Where I Belong - R.V.Elliott

Chapter 66 

"It all sounds to good to be true" I croaked wiping at my eyes. "I like us right now Blaze I like where we are but I don't know if I'm ready to give you another chance". 

As the words left my mouth the cabin door was pulled open Ally and Cage making their entrance. 

"I don't do woods" She grumbled shoving her hair out of her face and falling into the chair opposite me. 

Chuckling I watched as Blaze got up from kneeling and disappeared through to the bedroom. 

"Why do you sound so out of breath?" I asked noticing how the front of her jeans were dirty. 

"Because that through there is an idiot" She huffed peeling her jacket from her body. "We'll have enough gas until we get there" She mocked "The car ran out of gas and he made me walk for 2 hours". 

"Stop your whining" Cage grunted as he passed her a beer. "It's only a little dirt" He grinned sitting on the arm of the chair beside her. 

Rolling her eyes she took a sip of her beer before setting her gaze on me. "How are you feeling? Are you in any pain?". 

"Nothing I can't handle" I sighed as Blaze made his way back into the living area with only a pair of joggers on. Sitting down beside me only then did I notice the beer in his hand. 

"I really want a beer" I sighed knowing with the tablets running through my body that was not allowed. 

"I'll have one for you" He winked placing his arm around the back of the sofa so his hand was leaning on my shoulder. Sticking my tongue out at him like a child I watched him smirk over the top of hisam bottle. 

"Oh I brought you something" Ally piped up shoving her hand into her jacket pocket and pulling out my phone. 

"I gotta take this" Blaze mumbled as he shot Cage a look before they both left the cabin. Obviously something he didn't want me to know and frankly I was 

okay with that. 

"Just leave it there I'll charge it in the morning" Truth be told I was afraid to turn it on because I knew if there were messages from him I'd have to read them. 

"So how have things been between you two?" She asked making herself comfortable. "You seem toiy have gotten really close after the accident. Are you back together? Everyone will be ecstatic if you are" She grinned not letting me get a word in. 

"Ally we are not back together heck we never really were together in the first place not that it's got anything to do with anyone. And we've always been close, he's always been like that with me". 

"Like what?" She smirked causing me to roll my eyes. As much as I love her she sure did like a gossip. "Don't roll your eyes at me A, I'm your best friend and this is what best friends do". 

"He's my person" I shrugged not really knowing how else to describe it. "He's always there when I need him even if I hate him he's there. Gosh Ally he sat by my bed that whole time and not just that, everything he has done for me before me and you were even friends. We fight and we argue but I know for sure he is always going to be in my life. He gets me Ally like no other person does and it still terrifies the hell out of me. I love him I have for a long time and let me tell you hiding it is not easy and it hurts. I've tried everything to make me stop but deep down I know who my heart belongs to. Even after everything he did to me my heart still skips a beat every time I see him". I sighed no idea where this was all coming from. 

"Does he know this?" She asked sitting on the edge of her seat. 

"What that I love him? I screamed it at him a few months back" I shrugged. "Doesn't matter anyway because I'm not bringing it back up. We are good just now and do you know how nice it is not to argue with him every damn day?" I smiled. 

"The funny thing is you two are made for each other" she grinned taking another sip of her beer. 

Made for each other? Was she high? Maybe the beer had went to her head. 

"We are not made for each other Ally. We are both complete opposites and it's to much hard work. Do you know how they treated me when they all assumed I was his old lady?" I asked 

"Like royalty?" She winked "Blaze is VP of course they would all be grovelling at your feet". 

"You seem to know more about this than me" I huffed moving slightly so I could get more comfortable. 

"Seems to me all you are doing is making excuses. You love him and it's hurting you to hide it so why not tell him again how you feel and just go for it?". 

"Because I'm scared, he hurt me so bad the first time Ally and he was so nasty and because I'm not ready to be thrusted back into it all". Sighing I rubbed at my head as I could feel a migraine coming on. 

"Ava you do know your dad is the president right?". 

Rolling my eyes I chuckled a cushion at her head. "You know what I mean now can we please just drop the subject?" I asked just as the guys came back in. 

"Drop what subject?" Blaze questioned as he made his way towards me. 

"Nothing can you please help me to bed I'm starting to get and migraine". 

"You've been here less than half an hour and already you've gave my girl a migraine" Blaze joked as he gently picked me up and carried me to the bedroom. 

"Night Ally" I yelled as he closed the door behind us. Pulling the covers down he placed me in the middle of the bed. Grabbing two pillows he placed them under my leg so it was elevated and pulled the covers up and around my neck. 

I didn't realise how tired I was until my head fell against the soft pillows. 

Was he going to get in beside me? I could hear him shuffling around but because it was pitch black I couldn't see a thing. 

"Are you going to get in?" I asked his movements halting which made it harder for me to tell where about in the room he was. 

"I gotta make a few phone calls first but..." 

"Yeah you do that" I snapped regretting it instantly. I didn't mean for it to come out sounding pissed but I just wanted him to lay with me. It helped with the nightmares if someone was there. 

"Watch your tone darlin' you ain't to old to get put over my knee" Came his chilling voice as he flicked the light on making the hairs on the back of my neck stand up and not in a bad way. 

"Well" I sang not being able to stop my grin. "Be kinda hard putting me over your knee when I'm like this. Would it not?". 

"Don't get cocky sweets and less of the attitude it doesn't suit you" He grinned sitting on the edge of the bed. 

"Do you know what?" I asked about to change the subject completely and I had no idea what was going to happen but it had to come out. What I had been thinking and keeping to myself since I had woken up from the accident. 

"What?" 

"I'm a complete bitch and you should want nothing to do with me" I said watching the smile fall from his face. "I am Blaze I'm a horrible person". 

"Where is all of this coming from?" He asked edging himself closer to me. 

"Everyone around here thinks I'm this innocent little thing and they all fuss over me even you. Heck Blaze I was with you and then I was with your brother. What sort of a person does that?". I had to step into reality because what I had done wasn't right. "I slept with you in a closet while I was meant to be with your brother. You shouldn't want to be with me and you should hate me" I whispered swallowing the lump in my throat. I wasn't about to cry because I didn't deserve 

to cry. 

"Stop it right now" He snapped getting to his feet. "He got inside your head, he's good at that". 

So he's blaming Nate? 

"No Blaze don't blame Nate this was all me. I thought I could have been happy with Nate and the time we spent together made me believe it even more". 

"Ava shut your-..." 

"No" I yelled cutting him off "I don't deserve this whole tippy toeing around me. I hated you for what you did to me but I did something worse to you". 

"I pushed you to him" He sighed running a hand through his hair. "I broke your heart and you found comfort in my brother. Doesn't mean your a bad person sweets". Taking a seat he placed his hand on top of mine. 

"You don't get it" I sighed closing my eyes and taking a deep breath. "Why aren't you blaming me? Why can't anyone see what I did was wrong?". 

"Where is all of this coming from?" He asked as he let go of my hand so he could light up a smoke. 

"Been thinking about this since I woke up from the accident. It scared the hell out of me Blaze and I could have died. I got in to deep with everything, with you and Nate and what I had done. I was never that person Blaze and I didn't think I'd become that person but I did" I whispered feeling the loan tear roll down my cheek. 

"Baby..." 

"Stop being nice to me" I croaked turning my head so I didn't have to look at him. I felt ashamed. 

Grabbing my chin gently he turned my head so I was forced to look at him. "You aren't a bad person and don't bother interrupting just let me finish. You are the sweetest most kind hearted girl I have ever met. You save life's for a living, you're always looking after everyone else but yourself. I hurt you badly and I will regret it for the rest of my life and honestly I'm the one to blame for everything you did. You think you done something horrible because you accidentally met my brother. You didn't know who he was baby and yeah maybe you did like spending time with him and that's okay. You did something every other girl on this 

earth would have done but spending time with a guy isn't a bad thing. You liked him and you enjoyed his company, he made you feel special and after everything I had put you through you needed someone to be there for you and that someone was Nate". 

"But he was your brother I should have stopped the minute I found that out". 

"Doesn't matter that it was my brother, it could have been a random you met at the supermarket. I wound have still been pissed about it but I accepted well tried to accept that you had moved on" 

"But I- I hadn't" I stuttered opening up the old can of worms. So much for not mentioning it again. "I tried to distance myself from the club from everyone even my parents. I thought that if I kept busy and kept my distance it would go away but it never did and I don't think it ever will. I occupied myself and I hate myself for saying this but Nate was there and he was nice to me. He made me forgot about everything you did but still it wouldn't go away. And do you know how hard that is? Do you know how much it hurts?" I asked feeling drained physically and emotionally. 

"Ava what are you trying to say exactly?" He asked his eyebrows creased just like they always did when he was confused or didn't understand. 

Ignoring him I carried on "It feltyi like my heart was being physically ripped from my chest and there was nothing I could do about it. I was angry all the time and I couldn't be around here but you made it harder because you seemed to turn up everywhere". I laughed because if I didn't I would have started crying. 

Feeling him squeeze my hand I sunk my teeth into my bottom lip. "I gave up Blaze but I hadn't moved on". 

"I was never good at school Ava so you're going to have to dumb down what you just said because I don't know what you are trying to tell me". 

Bursting into a fit of laughter which ended up with me sobbing I rubbed at my eyes. "I love you Blaze I have since I screamed it at you in my dads office". 

Nothing... 

I had no idea how long we sat there in silence but my tears had dried up and I was becoming very sleepy. 

And then he broke it. 

"You love me?" He questioned getting to his feet. "You love me?" He asked again this time pacing the room. 

I just wanted to sleep now. 

Yawning I looked at him through half closed eyes. "Yes I do" I mumbled my eyes becoming heavier and closing on their own. 

"You actually love me?" He asked for a third time. 

"Uh huh" I groaned already feeling myself slipping into a peaceful sleep. 

"I need a drink" was the last thing I heard him say before I gave in.